Mummy thinks, Joshua thinks

Mummy thinks spitting juice at the nursery staff is not acceptable behaviour. Joshua thinks it is!

Mummy thinks that literally throwing ones favourite teddy out of the pram when Mummy isn’t looking then making her walk about a mile and a half in the rain to try and find it does not constitute as fun. Joshua thinks it does!

Mummy thinks that after several months of getting ones son into a sleep routine only to discover there are far more fun things to do in ones cot like getting on ones knees and slapping the walls. Joshua thinks sleep is beneath him!

Mummy thinks that sometimes it must be nice for little boys to get air time without a nappy but that does not give the go ahead to walk over to the antique chest nappy in hand and pee up against. Joshua thinks it does!

Mummy thinks that little boys should enjoy their food but not store it in their cheeks, desperately try and stuff more in only to realise there is no room then spit it out bean by bean. Joshua thinks there is absolutely nothing wrong with this!

Mummy thinks screeching in the back of the car as if you are being murdered and scaring your Mummy to death is not amusing in the slightest. Joshua thinks Mummy’s face after he has done this is the funniest thing in the world!

Mummy thinks staring intensely at strangers in restaurants without blinking can be a little off-putting. Joshua thinks its makes him looking interesting not mental!

Mummy thinks smiling and fluttering ones baby blue eyes does not mean you can pull out the newly planted flowers in the hanging baskets. Joshua thinks his tactics should work perfectly!

Mummy thinks toast tastes the same no matter whose plate it’s on. Joshua thinks the toast on Mummy’s plate tastes better and will not stop until he gets a piece!

Mummy thinks having ones bottle of milk before bedtime should be a calm time. Joshua thinks it means its slapping Mummy’s face and squeezing her nose so she cant breathe time!

Mummy thinks No No No means No. Joshua thinks it means Yes and I will do it again!

New Age Teenage Mum

As Joshua is in nursery now and I dont get to spend as much time with him, I decided that today I would treat us both to lunch. We went to the local watering hole where he was so well behaved and made a mockery of my complaints that at home he can be hard work and very demanding.

At the table next to us were an elderly couple whom for some reason Joshua could not take his eyes off. He seemed to delight in staring intensely at them. Undetered by his gawking the couple engaged me in conversation about his age, whether he was crawling and the stages that their grandchildren were at.

After we had finished our lunch (Joshua insisted on sharing mine) and bid the elderley couple a pleasant day we went to the bar to pay the bill. I realised I had left the wooden spoon behind that had our bill number on. As I returned to the table to collect it I overheard the couple talking about me.

"What a lovely young lady" they said. "Not like the usual teenage mums you see these days".
I walked away quietly confused. I didnt know whether to laugh or cry. I didnt realise I looked so young.

Have I produced a southerner?

I think there may have been a mix up at the hospital and I have ended up with the wrong son. Why have I come to this conclusion some 9 months down the line I hear you ask?

Well, I made lobby for Joshua's lunch today. For those of you that dont know Lobby is a traditional northern dish served in my home town. Its made from carrots, potatoes, peas and corned beef. Sounds disgusting and doesnt look much better I know but trust me it is very delicious. If you dont believe me ask George. He's from foreign parts and he loves the stuff, a nice winter warmer. Now I know its not winter but its an easy dinner, cheap and tastes good. Being full of goodness and made from home grown vegetables I was sure it would be a winner with Joshua.

He hungrily tucked in to the first spoonful but the second and third took some extreme persuading. After the fourth mouthful he refused my home cooked meal. I am traumatised. How can my my son, from my northern genes not like Lobby. I am hoping its down to the fact he isnt very well, has a cold and is teething and therefore not that hungry. If not perhaps my baby got swapped and I have ended up with a southern baby, either that or having been down South for the past 11 years there is something in the air that has caused this north to south switch

Today feels more like a rainy day

Today I returned to work after 9 months of maternity leave to be met with a 2 hour meeting, followed by introductions to new members of staff, a further 30 minute meeting, booked in staff appraisals for my team and been handed a bunch of CV's to assess.

Added to this when I logged into Outlook this evening I was astonished to see 30 emails already in my inbox. I have only been back at work for 3 hours!

Furthermore when I dropped Joshua off at nursery this morning he cried, refused to have his morning nap, had a fall and banged his head and fell asleep in the car on the way home which as I have already explained can sometimes mean he will refuse the offer of a nice sleep in his cot as being the hardcore little boy he is, thinks 20 minutes consitutes adequate sleep for a 9 month old.

In addition to this, he has a cold which has just come on this afternoon, is teething and completely out of sorts. After a dose of calpol, some bonjela and some snuffle babe, George and I prayed this tearful little boy would go straight to sleep. Thankfully our prayers were answered. I am however expecting the midnight caller to appear as the last time Joshua was ill we spent many an hour for a few nights cuddling him and trying him to go back to sleep with as little crying as possible.

I hope in a few weeks time, things will settle down for all of us and the sun will reappear.

Aqua aerobics‏

As I typed my previous post, I received an email from the local childrens centre regarding the aqua aerobics class during summer. The email reads:

"Due to a miscommunication the antenatal and postnatal aqua will not be running throughout the summer but will restart again in September.
Sorry for any incontinence caused"

This email itself almost made me wet myself.

Squash Squash and more Squash

Since moving to the countryside our domestic duties have accidentally become more clearly defined.
George tends to the garden, I tend to our son, George plants vegetables, I plant flowers. George washes the car, I wash the clothes. George leaves the toilet seat up, I leave it down. George empties the bins, I empty his wallet and so on. Our relationship works in perfect harmony.

Many months ago we embarked upon a new venture of growing our own vegetables, I was in my element making purees for Joshua as part of weaning him onto solids. Butternut Squash was definitely a favourite.
Over-excited I asked George to plant many a squash seed to accommodate Joshua's appetite and enjoyment of this vegetable. Reluctantly and against his better judgement George built a special structure to house purely Butternut Squash. With the recent mixture of sunshine and rain the Squash seemed to have taken over and we now have an abundance of them.

I haven't had the heart to tell George that in such a short space of time Joshua has progressed to other foods and his interest in Squash has somewhat waned. Perhaps we may have to donate some to the schools' harvest festival or I will need to produce some very appetising recipes that include Butternut Squash to keep George happy during the autumn months. Suggestions?

Taster Day Test

I cannot believe the past nine months have gone by so quickly and that the time has come for me to return to work and Joshua is to attend nursery.

George and I took him for his first taster session today. It’s a lovely nursery on a little farm with pigs, donkeys, goats, ducks and horses. George and I were blown away when we saw the place and met with the members of staff. We were sold instantly. That’s not to say we couldn’t wait to put Joshua into nursery, far from it. I am on the one hand pleased to be going back to work especially in light of my significant promotion and payrise, however I am so saddened that I will be away from my baby.

We arrived at the nursery and my stomach was churning, I felt like I was sitting an exam. I was extremely nervous and anxious about leaving Joshua for the next 3 hours. You see, he has never been left in the care of anyone else other than George and I, so for us this was such a big step. We handed him over to one of the nursery teachers, gave him a quick kiss and told him we would be back soon.

Before I embarrassed myself enormously by snatching back our gorgeous boy, George and I quickly exited the nursery and headed into the car park where the tears cascaded down my face.

We drove away in silence, our thoughts and feelings identical.
How could we leave our little boy behind?

Not knowing what to do with ourselves, we went to the coffee shop near where I work and managed to down 4 cups of coffee each then sat staring into the distance, our conversation very subdued.

At 11am we took off at speed back to the nursery to collect Joshua. We weren’t due back till 11.30am but could not contain our excitement that we were to be reunited with our little boy. Apparently the teachers said Joshua had been very good considering he didn’t have a nap and it was his first time being left with strangers. They have however advised me that the next few times we leave him it will probably be worse as he will know he is being left. This worries me as next time I won’t have George there for support.

I know in my heart that being at nursery is going to be so important in building Joshua’s confidence and independence and in a few weeks it will be routine for him. In the meantime however I will be the one having the sleepless nights wondering if he will be ok each time I drop him off for the day. Desperate for the time to come for me to collect him, swoop him up in my arms and give him a huge big kiss and cuddle.