Taster Day Test

I cannot believe the past nine months have gone by so quickly and that the time has come for me to return to work and Joshua is to attend nursery.

George and I took him for his first taster session today. It’s a lovely nursery on a little farm with pigs, donkeys, goats, ducks and horses. George and I were blown away when we saw the place and met with the members of staff. We were sold instantly. That’s not to say we couldn’t wait to put Joshua into nursery, far from it. I am on the one hand pleased to be going back to work especially in light of my significant promotion and payrise, however I am so saddened that I will be away from my baby.

We arrived at the nursery and my stomach was churning, I felt like I was sitting an exam. I was extremely nervous and anxious about leaving Joshua for the next 3 hours. You see, he has never been left in the care of anyone else other than George and I, so for us this was such a big step. We handed him over to one of the nursery teachers, gave him a quick kiss and told him we would be back soon.

Before I embarrassed myself enormously by snatching back our gorgeous boy, George and I quickly exited the nursery and headed into the car park where the tears cascaded down my face.

We drove away in silence, our thoughts and feelings identical.
How could we leave our little boy behind?

Not knowing what to do with ourselves, we went to the coffee shop near where I work and managed to down 4 cups of coffee each then sat staring into the distance, our conversation very subdued.

At 11am we took off at speed back to the nursery to collect Joshua. We weren’t due back till 11.30am but could not contain our excitement that we were to be reunited with our little boy. Apparently the teachers said Joshua had been very good considering he didn’t have a nap and it was his first time being left with strangers. They have however advised me that the next few times we leave him it will probably be worse as he will know he is being left. This worries me as next time I won’t have George there for support.

I know in my heart that being at nursery is going to be so important in building Joshua’s confidence and independence and in a few weeks it will be routine for him. In the meantime however I will be the one having the sleepless nights wondering if he will be ok each time I drop him off for the day. Desperate for the time to come for me to collect him, swoop him up in my arms and give him a huge big kiss and cuddle.